Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Violet Cove

From the age twelve to sixteen my mother, sister and I lived on 35th street, just a few blocks from Antelope Park. When I was mad I would pretend I was running away and I would run to the park and from there I’d run to Violet Cove. When I was happy I’d walk (or run) to the park, pretending I was in a magical world and I would go to Violet Cove. When I was at the park with my friends and we wanted to find fairies or have a picnic, we’d go to Violet Cove.

I think it was Jessie who introduced us to it. It wasn’t much, I suppose. Like a very shallow dugout in the side of the hill, a small creek of drainage running before it like a moat. There was part of an old bed frame thrown across the thin trail of water to act as a bridge. Trees grew around the center, which was a large storm pipe we could crawl inside. I remember there also being a piece of concrete that looked torn out of the ground by a giant and then thrown into the cove for sport. Jessie said that in the spring the whole cove was filled with violets, hence the name. And she was right.

I have so many good memories of Violet Cove. No one else seemed to know it existed. The runners ran on the path that was paved above it and people who walked by dismissed it as a dark, dirty area around the storm pipe. If you sat in just the right places, no one would even see you. I’d been looking forward to more good memories of Violet Cove…until they tore it down.
In the name of landscaping, our beautiful (though often misunderstood) hideaway, was bulldozed, chopped down and replanted, the pipe surrounded by an aesthetically pleasing stone.

I think the stones were to make the pipe look like it belonged there, like it wasn’t just jutting out of the hill along with tree roots and weeds. I, however, think the stones make the pipe look fake; like it has a bad wig on. The poor thing is blocked in and any root or weed friends it had are now imprisoned. It don’t like it one bit, and I don’t think the pipe does either.

Will anyone ever know how much a few kids treasured Violet Cove so much they gave it a name? Did anyone think of that when they decided to make it crumble away? No, I think everyone else thought it was an eyesore in an otherwise beautiful park.

In other news, James posted a blog, and part of my reply was something I’ve been meaning to blog about for awhile but have never gotten around to. I could turn it into a big, long blog (and maybe I will sometime) but I like my “in a nutshell” version:

My heart tells me that there are people in this word, both secular and spiritual, who will "make it to heaven". My heart tells me that I love God and God loves me even though I choose to listen to rock music and read fantasy books. With all this medical stuff going on I suppose I should be thinking "am I right with God?" but I'm not. I'm confident that the things I do don't matter as much as the spirit with which I do them. I still believe what the Bible says, and I'm not afraid to die. And should I wake up outside the gates of Jerusalem, so be it. I did my best, I lived my life in happiness and I knew that God loved me and I loved Him. If my being should end there, well, at least I made the most of what I had. Anyone who wants to preach to me about how I should shape up soon has my pity and God's disappointment. And that's what I believe.

2 comments:

Rayne said...

This brought back a very strong memory for me, of places I used to hide as a child.
I am horrified that your Violet Cove was destroyed. That so sucks!
And as for being 'right with God'.
No worries, he's not as mean as many religions make him out to be. Guilt is a harsh task master and it's applied liberally in the hopes that we will behave. But, really, He's all about love and forgiveness, and if you are not out there eating babies or setting puppies on fire? I really wouldn't worry about it too much.
He put us here to love Him and to love each other, and I'm sure you've got that down. And I'm also sure a few negative thoughts towards the med. twits that messed up your appt.s are totally allowed.

Becca said...

Rayne,
I've never thought God was mean, especially when I was young. But, the thing is, I've been Seventh-Day Adventist (on my own) since I was 16 and, while I still believe what they do (for the most part) I feel like I took things way to seriously. I mean, I was pretty darn conservative for awhile there. So, I still have this little nagging bit of me that says, "You're going to hell because you read Harry Potter!" But I know God knows our hearts even better than we do and, like I said, I have no worries about my place in His eyes.

And, yeah, I was kinda pissed about the whole, "Oops, we forgot to schedule an appointment and now you have to wait another week to be put on the transplant list" thing, but I seriously don't have the energy to be very mad. Go with the flow, that's me. Still,I'm not very excited about driving over an hour just to talk to a shrink. I think I'd rather have a blood test or something like that. More than that, I'm not happy about having to wait longer to go on the transplant list.