Last night I was up until past 4 AM. I got pretty darn close to having another pain episode, but thanks to multiple layers of narcotics, a heating pad and Catching-It-Early, I was okay. My mom had to go out to Walgreens at 2 AM and get me more pain pills. It was either than or another ER visit. So, all in all, I'm glad with how things turned out.
I've been kind of walking on eggshells all day because I know my body is ripe for another episode if I let it. Basically, I've been sleeping, reading and hugging my heating pad. I ate some stuff I didn't want to eat. I just ate it for the sake of eating. Why the hell do I do that? The Chex Mix is only going to make me feel worse, and yet a part of me knows that if I don't eat I'll starve or at least have to have a gastric tube put in, neither of which sound very pleasant. My doctors say I have "anorexia" and, even though they aren't referring to the mental disorder it still sounds bad. Hello, my name is Rebecca and I have anorexia.
Trust me, I would so be gorging myself at Village Inn if I could.
When I started writing this blog I for some reason thought it was going to longer and fun or at least meaningful, but I don't think that's going to happen.
Everyone send happy, healthy thoughts Rayne's way. She was sick(er) today. When I can get the stupid file to upload properly I'll show ya'll the present I made for her.
Remind me to tell ya'll how famous I am, too. I'm too tired right now.
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